FootBiz newsletter #175: The uniting effect of hydration breaks

In this era of division and polarisation it has become increasingly difficult to align on anything, even the smallest things.

But everybody* agrees that these hydration breaks are shit.

And, more importantly, everybody is aware that they aren’t hydration breaks.

So let’s just start with that, because there are a few angles to it.

Honestly, part of me wants to think that this one thing might be the straw that breaks the camel’s back. FIFA have utterly taken the piss in the last few years, and particularly so during this revenue cycle, which has encompassed the hugely-expanded Club World Cup and then the price-gouging international version of which we find ourselves in the early throes.

Yet for all the dynamic pricing, and the $100 train fares, and everything that has made people sigh and roll their eyes as we got closer and closer to the World Cup, they had at least stopped short of fundamentally altering the game and how it is played.

The hydration breaks have fundamentally altered the game.

Ironically, FIFA must be yearning for a game to be played in 100 degree heat right now so they can point to the hydration breaks as something that actually serves any sort of purpose. They were, as many nakedly commercial innovations have been in the NFL, introduced under the guise of player safety, after all.

Three minutes is too long, though. And the fact that broadcast networks are using them to go to an ad break (while fans in the stadium are sat twiddling their thumbs) is just a completely unacceptable situation. The visual of a FIFA official delaying play from being restarted until commercials were over is not one that Infantino can escape easily.

The above analysis is interesting from a sporting perspective, reflecting the anecdotal feel that these three-minute breaks are excessively disruptive to the game’s flow. Football is (supposed to be) a fluid sport, and that is part of its essential magic. Football is perpetual motion with pauses as punctuation, not mandated for monetisation.

Now, the reason that everyone in the second line of this newsletter has an asterisk is because there is always one contrarian bore who thinks that expressing an out-there opinion masks the fact that they have the intellect of a grasshopper and are detested by anyone who comes across their path.

In America, they choose to make this person a core piece of their World Cup coverage.

An analyst entirely devoid of insight, versed only in clichés and polemics, it has been interesting to watch the reactions of Thierry Henry and Rebecca Lowe, an elite analyst and anchor respectively, to the clown show that comes with Lalas on Fox. Given the world’s media is Stateside, the Fox coverage is being watched by more people in the game than ever before, and Lalas’ presence in 2026 is nigh-on unjustifiable.

But will this be the straw that breaks the camel’s back with regards to FIFA? I fear not.

Unfortunately, it seems like the best we can hope for out of this is that FIFA’s commercially-driven overstep is reviled enough that it prevents what otherwise might have been an inevitable rollout across other competitions around the world.

Unlike when rule changes or technological advancements are used successfully in tournaments and leagues seek to adopt them as soon as possible, you would expect the opposite effect for these hydration breaks. We might only see them in FIFA comps going forwards, and it will continue to be a black mark against them.

Chalk it up as another example of FIFA deciding this 12-month window was a once-in-a-lifetime opportunity to bleed the North American market for as much money as humanly possible.

Whoever at FIFA is charged with increasing sponsorship revenues during the 2027-2030 World Cup cycle is going to have a tough job.

Table of Contents

• Ceferin slip allows FIFA to land a punch

• Our first World Cup sacking

• “Brutal lesson in humility” for Spain

• Man United interest costs jump with refinancing

• Fulham in Arbeloa talks

• All change in Milan

• FIGC election this week

• Newcastle’s big sponsorship deal